


WE DEM BOYZ!!

by doujinzii



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Domestic, Established Relationship, Future Fic, M/M, Mild Domestic Fluff, Recreational Drug Use, Same-Sex Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-27
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-05-09 16:40:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5547659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doujinzii/pseuds/doujinzii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been months since Daichi hung out with the guys, but he's not so sure if he wants to go out tonight.  Future AU where everyone's in their 20s, has a stable job and is either dating or married to their significant other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	WE DEM BOYZ!!

**Author's Note:**

> This was so random I swear lol. I've been seeing "we dem boyz" on tumblr recently and I thought it was a meme, but when I googled it I found that it was just a song by Wiz Khalifa and since I'm haikyuu!! trash I couldn't help coming up with this (just imagine the four couples being split up so the captains are having their night on the town while their partners are having fun inside). The crazy part is that it only took me 24 hours to write when usually I need a few weeks to write up fics, but I guess I was really motivated! Just a few disclaimers:
> 
> ~I was too lazy to do the math and say everyone's exact age but they're all in their 20's. That may or may not be realistic considering their respective professions, but this is fiction, so I think I have a little leeway here :)  
> ~The only thing I relied on when choosing everyone's occupation was my intuition and what I thought would be a good fit with their personality/hobbies as mentioned in the anime (I don't read the manga). You may have a different job in mind for each of them, which is totally cool because what I wrote is not canon or anything (at least I don't think it is)  
> ~I'm pretty comfortable with writing Suga/Daichi since they're in the anime all the time, but my characterizations for the other characters (especially Bokuto and Akaashi) may be a little off, so please bare with me!
> 
> Okay, enough yapping! Enjoy~

“I don’t think I’m going out with the guys tonight,” Daichi sighed, plopping on the edge of the bed in defeat.  He had already gotten dressed and everything, but he couldn’t shake off the uneasiness he was feeling.

Suga just chuckled and rolled his eyes in the mirror before saying, “Mhm, sure you aren’t, Daichi.”  He loved his husband more than anything, but he refused to feed into the pity party Daichi was throwing for himself.  Literally every time he and the guys had time to get together like this—which wasn’t often considering how busy they all were—he tried to talk himself out of it, as if he was allergic to having a little fun.

“Suga, I’m serious!”  Daichi sounded really exasperated, so it was Suga’s turn to sigh to himself before turning away from the mirror to face him.

“Okay, what’s your excuse this time?  Because I know you don’t actually have a good reason.”  Suga crossed his arms in front of his chest, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Getting promoted to Sergeant is definitely a valid reason, Suga.  It’s only been three days, and I just don’t want anything to ruin my newly-earned title.”  He had gone into the force just a year after graduating from high school, and now he was the youngest sergeant in the precinct’s history.  Of course, Suga was more than aware of what Daichi had accomplished, and thought that was all the more reason to go out and enjoy himself.

“I get where you’re coming from, Daichi, but it’s not like none of the other guys on the job ever go out for drinks or something.  No one would fault you for going out to have a good time, especially since you work so hard.”  Suga crawled up on the bed to kneel behind Daichi, bracing his hands on broad, muscular shoulders as he massaged them.  When Daichi reached up to rest his hand on his, he continued, “I was glad that you didn’t go to work for a company, but I don’t want to see you work yourself to death like this either.  I know you love your job, but please, just go out and have fun, okay?  For me?”  Suga had wrapped his arms around Daichi’s neck and placed a soft kiss to his temple.

_‘Well, it’s hard to say no to that,’_ Daichi thought to himself.  “I guess it wouldn’t hurt to go out for a little while…” he said.  He was still reluctant to go, but he didn’t want Suga to worry about him like this.  Besides, it had been months since he and the guys had a night on the town.

“That’s the spirit!  Now I have to finish getting ready since I’m having the _other_ guys over for dinner tonight, but you should hurry up and change your shirt before they show up.”  With another quick peck on Daichi’s cheek, Suga was off of the bed and back in the mirror putting on his favorite watch.

Daichi frowned at the obvious dig at his style.  “What’s wrong with my shirt?  It’s just a button-up.”

“That’s exactly what’s wrong with it, Daichi.  You’re going to a bar, not a prefectural meeting.  Why not put on something more comfortable like a t-shirt?”  At the sound of the doorbell ringing, he chirped, “That must be Akaashi-san, he’s always punctual.”  Suga made his way downstairs as Daichi begrudgingly dug through his dresser for another shirt.

When Suga peeped out of the window in the living room, he was surprised to see Oikawa and Iwaizumi bickering outside instead.  “Hey you guys!  I’m surprised to see you here, you beat Akaashi for once.  Come on in,” he ushered, stepping to the side so the couple could come in.

“See Iwa-chan, I told you we left out way too early!  Akaashi and Bokuto aren’t even here yet,” Oikawa whined as he slipped his shoes off.

“And _I_ told _you_ that it pays to be early sometimes.  There’s no reason for us to be late all the time just because you want to spend two hours getting ready.  Oh, here you go, Sugawara-san,” Iwaizumi said, handing a large bottle of red wine to Suga that the latter didn’t even realize until he was holding until now.

“Oh, you didn’t have to!  But this will be perfect for tonight,” Suga said as he eyed the bottle in his hands.  He wasn’t much of a wine connoisseur, but he could tell this was top-notch stuff.  _‘Leave it to the professional chef to bring the best wine there is,’_ Suga quipped to himself, making his way to the kitchen.

“What are you guys even doing tonight?  Don’t tell me you’ll just be sipping wine and chatting about us,” Oikawa teased, taking a seat at one of the barstools in the kitchen next to Iwaizumi and perching his chin in his hand.

“That’s definitely part of it,” Suga smiled as he placed the wine in the fridge, “but don’t worry, we have something else up our sleeves.”  He winked at Oikawa, who jokingly put his hands up and cowered in fear.  “But anyway, how have you guys been?  It’s been a while since we’ve met up with each other.”

“That’s true.  My restaurant has been going well, and I’ve been traveling with this idiot recently since he apparently can’t live without a personal chef,” Iwaizumi answered, pointedly glaring at Oikawa but without any real malice in his eyes.  While he enjoyed flying around the country with his boyfriend, it was really hard to manage a restaurant when he had to cater to a single person for long periods of time.

Oikawa pouted slightly.  “Iwa-chan, you’re so mean!  You know you love cooking for me, and it’s so hard to find a good vegan chef these days,” he complained, “and my runway shows and photoshoots are so boring without you.”  He tried to snuggle into Iwaizumi, but he was elbowed in the side before he could.

Suga just shook his head at Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s antics—if he didn’t know them personally, he would never be able to tell that they were the same age.  Oikawa had a tendency to be childish and Iwaizumi seemed overly mature… _’but I guess opposites attract,’_ he reasoned to himself.

Just then, Daichi finally made his way downstairs, glancing at Suga and smiling when he nodded, approving his new choice of dress.  When he noticed who was here, he did a double-take, checking his watch for the time.  “Whoa, Oikawa is here _before_ we’re supposed to go out?  This never happens,” he joked, punching the model lightly in the arm.

“Easy there, Dai-chan, not all of us have muscles of steel,” Oikawa chuckled as a rubbed his arm.  “Oh, thank god you put on a normal shirt, I was gonna cry if you came down here with a button-up.”

Daichi threw his hands up in exasperation.  “What is with you guys and your hate for button-up shirts?  They’re perfect for any occasion!”

“Honey, no…” Oikawa nearly whimpered, covering his mouth with his hand in mock sorrow.  He’d really have to make sure to hang out with Daichi more from now on, he had so much to teach him about fashion.

It would have to be another time though, because just then the doorbell rang again, and this time when Suga looked out the window it was Bokuto and Akaashi.  He opened the door to greet them and let them inside, but Bokuto was noticeably sadder than usual.

“Hey everyone, long time no see,” Akaashi greeted, somewhat dragging his husband by his arm.  “Sorry I’m late, it took me a while to force Bokuto out of the house tonight.”  He took a seat at the dining room table among the chorus of hello’s, and Bokuto slumped in a chair right next to him.

“Uh oh.  Is he having trouble with one of his commissions?” Suga asked, taking a couple of dishes out of the oven.

“You could say that,” Akaashi started, peering over to look at his husband who had sullenly laid his head on the table.  “He had just started painting when he realized one of his brushes were missing, and he’s been like this ever since.  It’s been two days.”

“If that’s the case, why not buy a new brush?  I lose forks and shit in the kitchen all the time,” Iwaizumi said casually, not really getting where Bokuto’s source of anguish was coming from.  But that was Bokuto for you—he was a great artist yet oddly superstitious in a way, so if things weren’t how he wanted them then it ruined his whole mood.

“It’s not about the brush,” Bokuto said dejectedly.  “I can easily replace it, but the fact that I lost something so crucial to my work in the first place means that I don’t deserve to be an artist.  I can never paint again, you guys—all of my work is as good as trash now.  I’ll just let my students at the studio finish the piece, and I’ll close the studio down after.  Then I’ll cut off my hands and live the rest of my life as a miserable nobody…”  He looked like he was about to pull his hair out, but everyone else knew not to take his words too seriously.

“Bokuto-chan, it’s not that deep,” Oikawa giggled, the only one who was actually getting a kick out of this.  He stopped laughing when Iwaizumi pinched his arm and scolded him for his insensitivity.

“Oikawa-san is right, Bokuto, but if that’s what you want then so be it.  When you get back home tonight, I’ll talk to one of the surgeons on staff at the hospital to set up an appointment for tomorrow.  Just remember that you won’t be able to touch certain things anymore if you don’t have hands, though.”  Akaashi wasn’t fazed by Bokuto’s mood swings at all, and he kept a straight face as he talked, even when the last part was clearly suggestive.  When he was done, Bokuto cupped his chin in thought as contemplated his options.

Daichi cleared his throat and decided to change the subject.  “So, Akaashi-san, how’s your residency going?”

“Quite well, actually.  I was named chief resident a few weeks ago, and everything has been going smoothly.  I hope to be an attending physician soon, but I still have a lot to learn.”

“That’s so exciting!” Suga exclaimed, genuinely happy for Akaashi.  His relationship with Bokuto reminded him a lot of Oikawa and Iwaizumi’s because of how different they were, but they would probably say the same about him and Daichi, now that he thought about it.

Akaashi shrugged his shoulders.  “I guess so.  I bet your job is a lot more interesting though, Sugawara-san.”

“Oh, I doubt that,” Suga laughed, waving his hand.  “Well, a few days ago I had to talk to a pair of students that got caught making out in a supply room closet.”  Yes, he wouldn’t forget those two for a while—Kageyama-kun and Hinata-kun.  They were sent to his office so the three of them could discuss alternative ways to express their affection, and he couldn’t help feeling embarrassed for them both.  He was a guidance counselor now, but he remembers those days when he and Daichi would do the same thing all too well…

“Ohoho?  Hey, Akaashi, remember when we used to stuff in closets?” Bokuto said as he wiggled his eyebrows, apparently recovered from his earlier fit.

“But you were never in the closet about anything, Bokuto.”

“Akaashi!”

As the kitchen erupted into laughter, the doorbell rang for the third time that evening.  Before Suga could even check the window, he heard an awful rendition of what sounded like that new Adele song.

“Hello from the other side!”

“Kuroo…”

Suga opened the door, cracking a wide smile as he said “Well if it isn’t the party animal himself!  And Kuroo.  Come on in, everyone else is already here.”

As the pair slipped their shoes off, Kenma said, “Thanks for having us.  I know I don’t usually come to these kinds of things, but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try it out."  It was his first time hanging out with Suga and the others, and he was clearly a little anxious about it.

“Of course!  You’re always welcome, we’re all friends here,” Suga explained as he led them to the kitchen.  Kuroo hollered when he saw Oikawa, Daichi and Bokuto, the four of them fist-bumping each other and dissolving into their own little world.  _‘They’re so cute,’_ Suga thought to himself.

“Whoa, Daichi, who knew you were so beefy?” Kuroo joked, poking the man’s chest a few times.

“Well that’s what it takes to be a police sergeant,” Daichi beamed, flexing his guns playfully.  He definitely looked different from when he was in high school, with his shoulders much broader and his muscles more defined.  “I see you still haven’t fixed your bedhead, though.”

“Ohoho, goteem,” Bokuto laughed, trying to lay Kuroo’s hair flat only for the strands to stick back up when he moved his hands.

“Very funny you guys, really.  I’ll have you know that this ‘bedhead’ still got me roles in a lot of good movies this year,” Kuroo said smugly.  He wouldn’t be winning an Oscar anytime soon, but his success as an up and coming actor couldn’t be denied.

“Mhm, talk to me when you get booked for a spread in Vogue Japan, okay?”  Oikawa said.  Technically he was only in a perfume ad in the magazine, but the details didn’t matter.

“I don’t know about anyone else but there’s definitely way too much testosterone in here,” Suga joked, coming to stand beside Daichi to pat him on the arm.  “Why don’t you guys get going?  We want to get our own festivities started too ya know.”

“Well if you insist…” Kuroo started, a glint of mischief in his eyes as he looked at the other three.  “I did bring the mustang since tonight is special.”  He jingled the car keys in his hands, smirking as their eyes lit up in wonder.

“I call shotgun!” Bokuto yelled, taking off for the door before running back to Akaashi.  “Can’t forget a kiss and hug from you!” He hugged Akaashi tightly from behind, pressing several kisses to the top of his head.  Suga may have been seeing things, but he could’ve sworn that Akaashi was blushing.

“I’ll be back later, Iwa-chan.  Don’t have too much fun without me,” Oikawa said, kissing his boyfriend chastely on the lips.

“Don’t go too crazy, Asskawa.  You have to fly out to Okinawa tomorrow afternoon, and if you make us miss the flight I’m not going with you on another one,” Iwaizumi said.

“Yes sir!”  Oikawa said, pretending to salute Iwaizumi.

“Enjoy yourself, okay?  We’ll be back in a few hours,” Kuroo said, leaning down to kiss Kenma on his forehead.  The shorter man nodded, willing the anxious feeling in his stomach to die down.

Suga held onto Daichi’s hand, kissing his cheek before murmuring, “I love you.  Please have fun tonight, okay?”

“Don’t worry, I will.  Love you too.”  As Daichi walked away, Suga swatted at his ass playfully, winking when he turned around and making him blush.  He joined the others as they headed out the door, their partners following to wish them a good night and threaten them if they didn’t come back in one piece.

“Don’t make me have to bail you out, Daichi!  No one wants a jailbird for a sergeant,” Suga joked, unable to hold back his laughter when he saw how Daichi visibly blanched.

Akaashi joined in too.  “Make sure you don’t somehow cut off your hands, Bokuto.  I don’t have my medical license yet and I have no intention of becoming a back alley doctor.”

“They don’t have vegan food in jail so don’t get locked up,” Iwaizumi commented, frowning when Oikawa stuck his tongue out at him.

“I’m not good with people so don’t count on me if you get into trouble, Kuro,” Kenma said.  His social anxiety had gotten better over the years, but if he was faced with a stressful situation like that he probably wouldn’t be able to handle it.

Once the guys were all in Kuroo’s car, Suga closed the door and turned around to face his house guests before clapping his hands.  “The party has officially started!  Now, who wants a glass of wine?”

.............

Daichi hadn’t even been in the car for two minutes and he already regretted coming out.  No sooner than when they were all settled in the car with Kuroo and Bokuto upfront while he and Oikawa were in the back, Kuroo pulled a blunt out of seemingly nowhere.

“Is that—is that weed?  Kuroo, please tell me that’s not weed,” Daichi ground out, looking around to make sure no one was watching.

“Okay, it’s not weed.  Fuck, my lighter’s out.  Anyone got a spare?” Kuroo asked, pointedly ignoring Daichi’s mounting paranoia.

“Oh, here you go,” Oikawa said, handing over his favorite alien lighter.  When Kuroo made a face at it, he said, “What?  That lighter is out of this world, bro.”

“Not helping!” Daichi yelled, partially because that pun was horrible.  “Have you guys somehow forgotten that I’m a cop?  How could you be so reckless?”

“Daichi, it’s only one joint.  This should be child’s play…wait, don’t tell me you’ve never smoked before!” Bokuto said, turning around in the passenger seat to face him.

“Of course I have, but that was before I became an adult who abided by the law,” Daichi stressed.

Kuroo chuckled, taking a long drag from the blunt and blowing the smoke out slowly.  “We’re all adults here, and there’s nothing wrong with a little smoking.  Bokuto’s right, this is nothing.  I usually do at least three of these before I go out on set.”

“Yeah Daichi, how do you think I ended up as such a good painter?  Obviously no one can match my talent, but occasionally I need a little something to get the creative juices flowing, you know?” Bokuto explained, taking the blunt when Kuroo passed it to him.

Daichi couldn’t believe this.  He turned to Oikawa as his last hope.  “Please tell me you’re not into this, too.  I mean, isn’t getting the munchies bad for your line of work?”  Oikawa was the most slender out of the four of them, and surely maintaining his frame was important.

“Pshh!  Dai-chan that line of thinking is so ancient.  Just because I’m vegan doesn’t mean I don’t eat a lot,” Oikawa said as if he was laughing at Daichi’s ignorance.  When he saw that Bokuto was taking way too long with the blunt, he snatched it from his hand and said, “It’s called ‘puff-puff-pass,’ Bokuto, not ‘puff-puff-puff-puff-puff-puff-pass.  Jeez.”

Well, Daichi wouldn’t be getting out of this one.  “But Kuroo, don’t you have to drive?  You definitely shouldn’t be smoking.”

“Stop being so uptight, Daichi.  I had one hit, and besides I’m saving myself for the drinks.  Oikawa will be the designated driver then,” Kuroo said, somewhat appeasing Daichi’s fears.

“Now, be a good boy at take a hit or two or five, okay?  Don’t want you to be a downer the whole time,” Oikawa teased, placing the blunt in between Daichi’s lips.  “Now inhale”—Daichi held the blunt between his index finger and thumb, taking a deep breath before holding it in for a moment—“and exhale.”  He let the smoke billow out of his mouth, fighting the urge to cough as his eyes watered.  His throat was burning like hell, but he was already starting to relax a little.

Kuroo smirked, turning back around to start the car.  “I have the perfect playlist list for tonight,” he said excitedly, thumbing through his phone before plugging up the aux cord.  He rolled up all the windows and turn the volume up high, pulling away from the curb just as the song started.  Daichi took another hit when he recognized Wiz Khalifa’s voice, hoping to drown out the music that was loud enough to rattle his thoughts.

_Hol' up hol' up,_   
_Hol' up, we dem boyz_   
_Hol' up, we dem boyz_   
_Hol' up, hol' up, hol' up, we makin' noise_   
_Hol' up, hol' up, hol' up, hol' up, hol' up_

Kuroo sang the lyrics faithfully—as faithfully as a Japanese man who barely knew any English could, anyway—and was quickly joined by Oikawa and Bokuto by the end of the first part.  _‘Fuck it,’_ Daichi thought to himself, throwing caution to the wind and singing along too.

Man, it was gonna be one hell of a night.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope that wasn't too painful for you guys! I just find the idea of everyone being all domestic like this to be just the cutest thing ever. I wouldn't mind writing a sequel but I think this also does well as a standalone, so we'll see. Thanks for reading, and feel free to leave a kudos and/or a comment (it would be greatly appreciated!) :)


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